So, the past few days I have been trying to remind myself over and over about this ^^^^^!!!!!!!! Patience has never been a great virtue of mine (although I have prayed over and over for it) and right now we are kind of in a holding pattern as we wait to here back about a job he interviewed for on Friday. He works in a chemical plant and has been in the shipping department as a temp worker for 4 YEARS NOW! He received the job before we got married and he has applied a couple times now for permanent positions within the plant but always gets passed over for someone who has more experience. So, as you could imagine we both have been discouraged each time he has been passed over. Well, this last opening he wasn’t even planning to put in for the job and was at peace with that decision. Some things changed and there was quite a few people within the plant who kept encouraging him to apply for it because it would mean better pay and obviously a permanent position. Although he was initially reluctant he did apply and was interviewed last Friday. We are supposed to find out tomorrow whether he got the job or not tomorrow and with anticipation sometimes questions come up. “What if your passed over again? When is it finally gonna be our time?” This period of waiting has caused me to question things and feelings to come up, both bad and good, and I have found myself praying to God to help both of us in this time. Lately my prayers have gone something like this:
Thank you for your provision and your love that you have bestowed upon us and always meeting our needs. Lord, please help us to be at peace with whatever decision is made in regards to Steven’s job. Lord, it is the desires of our heart that he would finally get this job and that we would finally feel at ease and not struggle month to month anymore. God, I know your timing is perfect and if he is passed over once again I know you have something better in store for us. I have to confess that I say these words but feel they are hollow, but I am clinging to your word as the absolute truth and I know what Jeremiah 29:11 says and I believe that you DO have plans to prosper me, not for HARM but to give me a HOPE and a FUTURE. God I know you are good and sovereign and you have your hands in ALL things and you love your children and want and know what is best for us. Lord help me to trust in Your truth and know that You have us and will continue to care and provide for us. I love you Lord and I want what you want so please, help me now to wait on YOU. Help my unbelief, help me to know without a shadow of a doubt that You have our best interest in mind.
I love you and trust in You Lord.
As I am going through this I am reminded of Bethany Dillon’s song, “To Those Who Wait” and I take so much comfort in the words of this song.
The lyrics that hit home to me right now in this time of waiting would have to be the first part of the song that says,
“My heart’s discouraged,
So I come to You expectant.
You say You’re good to those who wait.
Lord, today You know what I need to do,
But You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I could do.
So I won’t run anymore.
I’m waiting on You.”
What are you waiting on the Lord for today? Is your heart like mine and discouraged? Look to Him with me and trust in His kindness, goodness and place His perfect timing before ours. I am right alongside of you and the words I say are to me just as much as they are to you.
Your sister in Christ,
Lyrics to the song were found at http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/bethanydillon/tothosewhowait.html