I was always fairly active throughout my youth and then, like many people do I went away to college and packed on the freshman 15 (or 20 lbs), then I got married and as many married couples do I gained probably another 10-15 lbs. Then I got pregnant and packed on a whopping 50 lbs during my pregnancy causing me to have gestational diabetes, low self-esteem, and decreased level of exercise. Add all that weight gain on a 4 foot 11 woman and you have a problem….it was easy to blame it all on the pregnancy, but here we are 2 years later and all of the weight, and a little more is still accounted for and I find myself hating what I see in the mirror and what I have become and I see friends of mine entering into their second pregnancies and I am so overjoyed for them and so eager to join them in becoming a mommy again but struggling with the cold hard facts that having another child again where I’m at physically could be dangerous not just to me but to the baby so this weight loss goal is not simply an aesthetic goal but a functional goal so that i can run with my son, and be heart healthy and have a non-complicated low risk pregnancy. I’m not doing this so I can be “beach-ready” for the summer, I am doing this for my husband, Steven, so I can be happy, and healthy and able to do all the things we want to do. I am doing this for my son, Silas, so I can run, hop, skip, jump with him and take him to the park without being out of breath or just sitting and being a bystander as he plays. I am doing this for my future child so he or she can be as healthy as possible while they are inside me and have the best chances of being carried to full-term and have a healthy mommy who can breastfeed and provide for both him or her and their brother. I wasn’t sure just how much I wanted to share but then I read a friends blog who I knew from youth group and he wrote about his struggle with weight loss in a post called, ” An Addicts Tale of Recovery:Part 1″ which can be viewed here. I couldn’t agree with him more, and I know it’s not every persons struggle, but it’s his and it’s definitely mine as well. Food is an addiction that I have, and it’s not to downplay addictions to substances like alcohol and actual drugs, but for me food is my addiction and the tricky part is that it is not something you can give up, it’s not something you can go without so it’s a constant struggle, and one that looks you in the face 3 times a day every day. It is going to mean a lot of dedication and strictness and it means saying no when I want so badly to say yes. It means giving myself restrictions and sticking to them… it means exercising 3-6 times a week and doing more than just walking around the neighborhood. It means eating fruits and vegetables at every meal and filling up on water and giving up soda. But the goal is going to give me back so much more than the taste of something momentarily sweet. It’s going to give me my life back, my confidence back, it’s going to help me add to my family and it’s going to help extend my life. These are the things I need to think on and remember when I am grocery shopping, when someone asks me out to eat, when I want pasta instead of salad, when I am downing the 6th water that day and all I really want is a coke. My life back, my health back, my self-esteem back, my confidence back. This. Is. The. Fight. So, I want to write out first some health/food goals that I am making for the new year:
1. Drink 6 bottles of water a day (16.9 fl. oz bottles so about 100 fl oz a day)
2. Cut out all soda of any kind
3. Eat a fruit and a vegetable at every meal
4. Eat small (obviously healthy) snacks between each meal
5. No eating after 8:30 PM
6. Begin cutting out processed foods as much as possible
7. Limit the amount of sodium I am consuming
8. Maintain a low-carb lifestyle consuming the majority of carbs from fruits and vegetables as opposed to grains
9. Eat more fish (once a week) and chicken or lowest fat meat possible
10. Always, always, ALWAYS stop eating when I am full. I am usually pretty good about this but sometimes I get the thought in my head that I must eat everything that is on my plate and it’s not healthy and just causes heartburn and indigestion (and many times guilty conscience).
My exercise goals are as follows:
1. Walk daily or at least 4 times a week in my neighborhood (at night when the weather gets hot)
2. Start lifting weights 3 times a week
3. Get involved in at least 2 classes a week at the gym
4. Include my son in exercise twice a week (park, playground, outside running around, etc.)
5. Once a week do something as a family (probably weekends) like finding trails to walk or ride bikes. Something active and out of the house.
6. Be more active throughout the day. Set a timer or every hour on the hour walk around the house, do sit-ups or push ups, etc.
7. Find a friend to workout with twice a week to provide accountability as well as someone to enjoy working out alongside.
8. Sign up for and do three 5 K’s
9. Sign up for and do one 10 K
10. Build up my endurance and strength to start doing some running.
All of these are goals and things I want to strive my best to accomplish, but I know I will have set backs, I know there will be hard days but I am praying that the Lord will help me in the year 2015 to have more good days then bad days, more days spent on track then off. It is not my hope, it is my prayer because I have tried hope. I have done the whole hope thing for over two years now and it has gotten me no where. But there is power in prayer and I know my God is good and He provides us with the strength we need for things if we would only just come to Him humbly and ask Him. So, I want to end this post with a prayer, and I can make it a general one so whatever it is that you have for your New Year’s Resolution you can enter it into this prayer.
Thank you for all that you are and all that you have done for us. Christmas was just a few days ago and so the incarnation of Christ is still fresh in our minds and our hearts and we are so thankful that you sent your son to come live a life lowly as a servant and to live the perfect life so that He could ultimately die for our sins and that we could have a way back to you. Lord your strength is incomprehensible, it is stronger than anything we could ever imagine and we know that You can make the impossible possible. Lord, we have all tried to do things on our own. We have tried to be our own masters and we have tried to keep the reigns and not relinquish control to you, or to anyone for that matter but as the New Year is upon us and we begin to assess changes, new or old, that we are wanting to make we are faced with the realization that these things are not going to be easy but are hard, and some might seem even impossible. So, we come to you with our struggle of _______ and we give it to you Lord. We know there will be lots of work and effort that we need to place forth to meet our goal, but Lord we need Your strength because we WILL grow tired and weary and weak and we need you to be there beside us. Lord we are asking you to walk with us this year, in 2015 and help carry us when we feel to weak to carry on, Lord lift us up and help us so that we can honor and glorify you in the new year and when we reach our goals we can humbly say, “It was all God. I could not have done it without HIM.” Lord help strengthen us and help us to always know that it is because of YOU that we can accomplish anything, even the simplicity of inhaling and exhaling. Please keep us humble as we strive to meet our goals and strengthen us each and every day. Help us to remember that each day we start anew and that because we have you we have nothing to fear or worry about, YOU have this God and we need to remember and trust in YOU. Thank you for all that you do and all that You are and thank you for caring about us enough to care what we care about. We love you so much.
It’s in your name that we pray,